I know it’s been awhile. Between winter (which means lots of grey and tons of rain) and adjusting to life in a new country, I haven’t had a lot of “output” in my brain. We’ve also been dealing with the cold.
Now, now, don’t get your feather’s in a fluff, I know it’s not cold like Polar Vortex cold. It’s more the ancient old walls and seeping in from the floor kinda cold. I finally cracked and went and bought 4 portable heaters. It was exhausting being “chilly” all the time. It’s also very expensive to keep us warm. Who needs new clothes anyway???
You don’t realize just how much you’ve gotten used to it till you go somewhere that has real functioning heating. When we go to the mall, we end up sweating and peeling all our layers off because, “damn it’s hot in here!.”
The other thing we’ve been dealing with is our shared wall (our home is end of terrace). The neighbours have been doing reno for the past few months. Endless banging, drilling, and grinding OH MY! Just when I thought we were through the worst of it, the folks behind our back garden wall started with the back hoe. I had mild thoughts of “well, maybe they are just fixing up their yard” and it will be over soon.
Have I mentioned I’m a very odd optimistic pessimist? Well, the next door neighbour (our reno buddy) told me yesterday that they are building a HOUSE back there. Oh yes! Oh bother.
So my foreseeable future will be bang bang bang. Which leads to other things.
We may have to MOVE AGAIN! Yes, it’s in the cards, but we are trying to figure out just how to shuffle them. It’s mostly a visa issue for my youngest daughter. Seems the EU is more flexible than IE. (europe/ireland)
Amongst all these things a very odd shift has occurred within me. After quite a few decades of banging my head on the “oh what will I do with my life” wall (and yes, there are a few things I already do but they have grown old and boring to me) I have finally come up with what I want to do for the next, let’s say, 10-15 years.
Thus the clay. I have started a ceramics class (pottery for those from the US). I want to incorporate it into my long range goals of owning/creating an herbal garden for teaching purposes. I’m finally living in a place where I can grow things. Now I have to find a way to own a patch of land so I can build and grow on it.
Yeah, I know, baby steps. I’ve just arrived on this lovely Emerald Isle.
But I’ve noticed an interesting thing about Ireland. It helps you KNOW what you want to do. Some how it creates a space within for those answers to come.
While living in Arizona I found meditation a breeze. I could pop in and out without blinking really. But here, not so much. It’s a very grounding place. But I’ve found my heart is clearer here. I’m much less mindful and much more in my heart (which can be a good or bad thing depending on what part of it I’m roaming around in that day).
Then, that of course, leads to my Solar Heart. What’s that you say? Oh, well, google it. It’s one of those odd spiritual things that some of us manifest for whatever reason (and no, I don’t know why). And since I’m living in the land of GREEN (associated with the Heart Chakra), my solar heart has been just NOT HAPPY. Think cramps in the diaphragm not happy. Which leads to cramps in my back not happy. So yeah, Heartlandia can be an up and down experience for me.
But to be honest, I’m grateful to be out of my head. Even when it was zen quiet, it was always darting off here and there. I like this feeling, whatever it is. It’s not always happy, but it is much more real.
And I’m delighted to have my hands back in the dirt and clay. I may never be amazing at any of it, but I love the challenge, so off I go~